Urban Mixer Weekly : October 30th, 2006
Week of October 30th - November 5th, 2006
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Let us begin the Beguine (whatever the hell that is) and make beautiful music together. Our Roaring Twenties Memorial email presents the very finest in intoxicating entertainments for the finest ladies and gentlemen ever to go to the dogs. I think the dog track is in Stampede Park, right?
With apologies to Dorothy Parker
Email pings you.
Cellphones all ring.
Your ringer sings, too.
Texting’s the next thing.
The inbox is flooded.
Your boss just won’t give.
This rat race is hellish.
Hey, cut loose and live!
With apologies to Cole Porter
Have you heard? Among this clan,
I am called “The Informed Man”?
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is!
Have you heard? It’s in the stars
Somebody might re-open Mars.
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is!
Have you heard that Kinnie Starr
Will be singing in local bars?
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is!
What bands? What things?
What pubs? What bling?
What restaurants?
It’s all too (dos)exquis!
What a swell party this is!
If you’re in the know, in the swim, or in the lead, we want you to give us the red-hot latest by emailing raj@urbanmixer.com. If you’re in the joint, say hi to our stockbroker, the lousy bum. If you’re the first to tip me off about an upcoming event that is Urban Mixer-worthy, I will send you a very Urban Mixer-worthy cotton t-shirt to wear to all your casually elegant soirees, gratis and gratitudinal-like. It’s all too exquis!
So welcome to the middle of the Beguine. More apologies to Cole Porter, but really, there’s fuckall he can do about it eh?
When Raj begins the Beguine
He gives you the list of parties so fabu,
He delivers a week of pleasure to you,
He asks you for only a little green.
Oh yes, let us begin the Beguine,
Now we’ll play!
Till the stars that are here
Filming try to pick up you,
Till they whisper to you once more,
“Hohan’s jealous of you.”
And we suddenly know what league we are in
When we begin the Beguine.
How to access the calendar
From This Paragraph On
From this sad graph on,
Here’s your week, dear,
Seven days toute suite, dear.
CALGARY | VANCOUVER
From this new graph on,
No more monthlong
Day by day, each one strong
From this sentence on.
With apologies to Dorothy Parker, who is also dead like Cole Porter and thus unable to phone her lawyer.
Observation
If you don’t hang out at Sandy Beach,
You’ll probably extend your reach.
If you’re in bed each night by ten,
You’re pretty sure to save some yen.
If you hold back from fun and such,
And avoid drink, that demon’s crutch,
You’ll no doubt start to make your mark
And nobody will give a fark.
If you go out late after it’s dark,
You’re likely gonna to have some spark.
If you’re the centre of the fun
There’s no doubt you’re my number one.
You know who’s who, what’s what and all.
It’s likely I’ll give you a call.
So let’s all stay the way we are,
And rendezvous at some hot bar.
Raj Taneja
The F. Scott AND Zelda Fitzgerald of Vancouver
phone: (800) 688-1868 x 911
raj@urbanmixer.com
www.urbanmixer.com
… the cure for the common social life
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